Thursday, January 28, 2010


i gave and i received today.
i've been thinking about it and it's a wild thought to know that i have no contact with my blood after it's taken away from me. however it, then, belongs to someone else. is it unconditional love because of the the not knowing, no pre-existing conditions of the exchange? i received an intense amount of priceless, first hand reviews of a building in princeton. i need to think, but i really need to sleep. goodnight little girl trapped inside me. i will start taking care of you. i do believe i can only offer unconditional love to strangers and acquiescences. it's really hurtful to acknowledge that. (skipping all the self festering) blahblahblah by ke$ha was talked about in radigals tonight. i danced.
on this is what my arm looks like now. it looks worse in person.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

look who said good morning to me this morning,

bleak introduction to the day.
but i must say that i do enjoy going into a building when it is dark-dark out and coming out to sunshine and bird noises. well, all except this little guy.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

shuffle amongst gym scuff

i can pretend i am okay, if okay means i am not.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

beautiful heads, but no brains.

belles tetes, mais de cervelle point
honore daumier
i already feel
a black cloud
i thought
don't want
and don't speak
i live and i see
eric bularer 1972
vserolod nikolaevich nekrasov
is married to
oleg tselkov
one enormous orphanhood
one enormous emptiness
yu. baltrushaitis
at the crossroads
i had to push a button
under a blue light
to the right
too make the
lumia aurora appear
this is for real
earl reiback
fox and bust
where is
valentia kropivnitskaia?
at the bottom of
five black coffees.
i write all day, feverously. at 11:08PM i only end with fragments of what i think, see and saw. he writes of importance and nuances. i write the mundane and incomprehensible.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

sunday day&night.

we could not see the rooftops nor could my sandwich stop sweating.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Monday, January 4, 2010


i find myself saying something then cementing it with purpose and reasoning. or responding to someone's observations with more of the same. a few years ago i made a resolution to stop explaining the world and it obviously was never practiced. my own brain is my wonderland and not everyone needs access to it. stop explaining. stop waiting for explanations. things just proceed however(ly).

Sunday, January 3, 2010

ripout instead of cutout.

breakfast tomorrow:
almond milk pumpkin pancakes.
and i'm actually following the recipe [from a shoprite magazine].... well, enerG instead of the 2 eggs called for.

ps. studying seems much lamer now.

Friday, January 1, 2010


bye 9.
hi 10.
cate was my new years kiss, then jonathan.

1. talk to dad every day

2. gluten-free lifestyle

3. make big dinner on sundays

4. quit licking the batter in the bowl

5 empower people or be like brian porbansky

[EDIT] 6. stop giving reasons, explaining my thoughts & action

porbansky styled new years means loving people, being nice, making strange faces, growing guts, vegan deliciousness and doing absurd things. i hope this is how 2010 will stay.